If we keep Albert, what should his new job be?

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Hooligan
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If we keep Albert, what should his new job be?

Post by Hooligan »

Assuming the 'Skins have to keep Fat Albert because of poor trade value and not getting any of their money back, what do you think the team should do with him? Ideally, his new job should suck so badly he will actually consider forfeiting millions to "retire."

If he has to take up a roster spot, I suggest special teams only. Make the fool (try to) sprint up and down the field constantly.

Otherwise, I say stick a giant indian headdress on him, give him a little plastic tomahawk, and let him parade around with the cheerleaders.


What else?
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Re: If we keep Albert, what should his new job be?

Post by yupchagee »

Hooligan wrote:Assuming the 'Skins have to keep Fat Albert because of poor trade value and not getting any of their money back, what do you think the team should do with him? Ideally, his new job should suck so badly he will actually consider forfeiting millions to "retire."

If he has to take up a roster spot, I suggest special teams only. Make the fool (try to) sprint up and down the field constantly.

Otherwise, I say stick a giant indian headdress on him, give him a little plastic tomahawk, and let him parade around with the cheerleaders.


What else?



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Post by Scottskins »

nose tackle, and if he doesn't try, then he needs to be at every game in street closed because he is inactive...
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Post by The Hogster »

Depends on what he does when he shows up for work. If he does a mea culpa to his teammates and actually is willing to play football with some form of effort, then play him however the coaches planned, at NT and DE.

If he comes in and gives a half a$$ attempt at everything, doesn't do his assignment etc. Then you follow protocol, 1) warn him 2) suspend him 3) file grievance to recoup money.

Charley Casserly agrees with this line of thinking too.
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Post by Punu »

You know we could use him in a few positions, but screw it... he has no respect, I hope he never plays another down for the Skins again
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Post by CanesSkins26 »

Scottskins wrote:nose tackle, and if he doesn't try, then he needs to be at every game in street closed because he is inactive...


Defense end. He has no business being a NT. The guy is a disruptive force on the line, you don't waste that by having him occupy blockers.
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Post by ATX_Skins »

See if BP is willing to buy out the remainder of the contract in another effort to plug the pipe.
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Post by tribeofjudah »

put him on the practice squad....that'll teach him.
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Post by Manchester_Redskin »

He needs to be used in a system that he is very familiar with and which he had lots and lots of experience of last year ...

put him in charge of handling the oxygen tanks
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Post by Punu »

tribeofjudah wrote:put him on the practice squad....that'll teach him.


that would be hilarious
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Post by The Hogster »

Since we are supposed to be running a hybrid version of the 3-4 and 4-3 defenses, put him as a backup Defensive Tackle and only send him in during the 4-3 packages.

You would think that would satisfy him since he "only wants to play in a 4-3". Let him sit for 80 percent of the plays when we're in thirty four and play in the scheme he wants.

I don't think the Inside Backers would trust him in front of them now anyway. I could hear the announcers now. :lol:
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Post by yupchagee »

ATX_Skins wrote:See if BP is willing to buy out the remainder of the contract in another effort to plug the pipe.


Are you suggesting that they try another "junk shot"?
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Post by VetSkinsFan »

The Hogster wrote:Since we are supposed to be running a hybrid version of the 3-4 and 4-3 defenses, put him as a backup Defensive Tackle and only send him in during the 4-3 packages.

You would think that would satisfy him since he "only wants to play in a 4-3". Let him sit for 80 percent of the plays when we're in thirty four and play in the scheme he wants.

I don't think the Inside Backers would trust him in front of them now anyway. I could hear the announcers now. :lol:


I imagine this would help limit his incentives in his contract, too, thereby saving money.
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Post by ATX_Skins »

yupchagee wrote:
ATX_Skins wrote:See if BP is willing to buy out the remainder of the contract in another effort to plug the pipe.


Are you suggesting that they try another "junk shot"?


True, he probably woudn't show the day of.
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Post by Andy614 »

We could use him to pick up the wet towles in the locker room. That's as close as he deserves to being a Redskin.
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Post by PulpExposure »

Andy614 wrote:We could use him to pick up the wet towles in the locker room. That's as close as he deserves to being a Redskin.


I'd send him out to pick up hamburgers for the team for lunch. You know he's good at that...
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Post by The Hogster »

PulpExposure wrote:
Andy614 wrote:We could use him to pick up the wet towles in the locker room. That's as close as he deserves to being a Redskin.


I'd send him out to pick up hamburgers for the team for lunch. You know he's good at that...


The fox guarding the hen house. lol Maybe we can make him run 10 100s for every burger he eats before getting back.
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Post by yupchagee »

PulpExposure wrote:
Andy614 wrote:We could use him to pick up the wet towles in the locker room. That's as close as he deserves to being a Redskin.


I'd send him out to pick up hamburgers for the team for lunch. You know he's good at that...


What are the odds that any of the burgers would actually make it back uneaten?
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