I'm glad Jim Zorn has so much media availability, from his Sunday press conferences to his Monday press conferences to his Monday appearances on Comcast SportsNet to his Tuesday appearances on ESPN 980. But at some point, maybe it'd be better if he stopped talking. Because honestly, the more he discusses his blown replay challenge on that crucial fair catch disaster against the Panthers, the worse he sounds.
"Obviously, the big play of the game was the punt return," CSN's Chick Hernandez said during his weekly Monday sit-down with Zorn. "Randle El goes back there, and Byron Westbrook gets caught getting pushed into Randle El. And I'm watching with B-Mitch, he knows the rule right off the bat, he sees what's going on. What did you see, and on that sideline, did you know the rule immediately?
"Yeah, well, I knew most of the rule," Zorn responded. "But it turns out I didn't know one little phrase, and that was a passive player versus an active player. A player who's just standing there, he can't get pushed into the fair catch. But when two players are running like they're doing, and blocking or trying to not be blocked into the fair catch receiver, the fair catch is off. You can actually hit that guy. And so that's what happened. And I thought it was worth trying to challenge it to see if we could get that ball back, but to no avail."
Most of the rule! Look, I know that poor abused timeout ultimately didn't matter. But if you're the head man of an NFL team, I'm thinking you should probably know even the "one little phrase" part of the old fair catch rule. Because, see, it turns out that, say, a DeAngelo Hall knew the whole dang rule.
"When I was in Atlanta, we actually trained our guys--once you're engaged and the guy fair catches--to run [the opponent] into him," Hall told Larry Michael during the postgame coverage. "That's why [when] everyone was saying, 'Nah, he fair caught...' Nah, I'm over there telling everybody, 'It don't matter, it don't matter, you can push him right into that returner.' And that's the thing. That's why we need to get out the way."
So why, then, did Zorn challenge the call? Because he figured that even if Westbrook was legally blocked into Randle El, maybe the ball glanced off the Carolina player first, right? No. No no no no no. That's not why he challenged it.
"I knew it went off [Westbrook's] foot," Zorn told Hernandez, which nearly caused me to choke on my roasted pumpkin seeds. "I was trying to challenge the reversal of giving our receiver an opportunity to make a fair catch when signaled, no matter where it was on the field. Antwaan had to run up 14 yards to catch this thing, that's how short the punt was. You just don't blame anybody. It was just unfortunate, very unfortunate."
So to be clear, what he thought he was challenging was the reversal of giving his receiver an opportunity to make a fair catch when signaled. And here's what the official said after Zorn threw his challenge flag:
"Washington is challenging the ruling on the field that the ball touched his receiver."
Bzzzzz. Gong. Hsssss. Booooo. Thhhbbbbbbbt. Choose your method of vocal scorn here, but it had best be loud. Because Zorn and the official weren't even in agreement on what he was even challenging arggggghhhhhh /drives remote control through skull
"After reviewing the play, the ball hit the Redskins receiver, No. 34, in the foot," the official said after the review, even though Zorn apparently already knew that. "The ball belongs to Carolina, first down, Washington will be charged with a timeout." For some reason, he mentioned nothing about the reversal of any sort of opportunity.
Look, I couldn't be an NFL head coach, and you couldn't be an NFL head coach, and the guy sitting three seats down from you couldn't be an NFL head coach, and Steve Spurrier couldn't be an NFL head coach. But luckily, only 32 people actually have to serve as NFL head coaches. And maybe each of those 32 fellas should know the whole NFL rulebook, and should have a policy against mystery voodoo replay challenges over gaping voids of ethereal nothingness.
(For the record, Zorn also discussed special teams play during his session with Hernandez. "Our special teams is playing GREAT," he said.)
http://voices.washingtonpost.com/dcsportsbog/2009/10/zorn_admits_he_didnt_know_fair.html#more