Why, Why, Why
do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting dead?
Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough money?
Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?
Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?
Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?
Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?
Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?
If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?
Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?
Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?
Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?
Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?
How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?
When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, "It's all right?" Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, "That hurt, you stupid idiot?"
Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?
In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?
How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
And my FAVORITE......
The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four persons is suffering from some sort of mental illness. Think of your three best friends -- if they're okay, then it's you.
Why Why Why
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1niksder
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Why Why Why
..__..
{o,o}
|)__)
-"-"-
When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hold on....
If the world didn't suck we'd all fall off
{o,o}
|)__)
-"-"-
When you reach the end of your rope, tie a knot in it and hold on....
If the world didn't suck we'd all fall off
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andyjens89
- Hog
- Posts: 1881
- Joined: Sun Mar 21, 2004 10:15 pm
- Location: Michigan
Re: Why Why Why
1niksder wrote:If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?
Exactly
XVII XXII XXVI
These are great, if they aren't from George Carlin they sure remind me of him.
2 from him that I remember are....
How come when you open a new loaf of bread you always skip past the first few pieces?
and
How come when you open a middle desk draw there are always a few pennies in one of the front corners?
2 from him that I remember are....
How come when you open a new loaf of bread you always skip past the first few pieces?
and
How come when you open a middle desk draw there are always a few pennies in one of the front corners?
AnTsSkInZ
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skinsfan#33
- #33
- Posts: 4084
- Joined: Sat Jul 24, 2004 9:44 am
Why are TV commercials 50% louder than the program you are watching on TV? Why is it people only walk in during one of those loud commercials and ask if you're deaf?
Why do you send shipments by truck, but cargo by ship?
Why is it that when we find something we are looking for, we say "It was in the last place [we] looked", do people continue looking for something after they found it?
Why do drug companies advertise for something you can only get through a doctor's prescription? Why do the side-affects always sound worse than what you were trying to cure?
Why do hot-dogs come in packs of 10, but hot-dog buns in packs of 8?
Why is it always 4 out of 5 doctors that recommend things? Why is it never 5 out of 5? Do 4 out of 5 doctors think 1 out of 5 doctors is an idiot?
Why does halftime seem longer when you're watching the game on TV, but incredibly short when you're at the game?
Why is it a crime to attempt suicide, but only if you fail? Isn't that insult to injury?
Why do you send shipments by truck, but cargo by ship?
Why is it that when we find something we are looking for, we say "It was in the last place [we] looked", do people continue looking for something after they found it?
Why do drug companies advertise for something you can only get through a doctor's prescription? Why do the side-affects always sound worse than what you were trying to cure?
Why do hot-dogs come in packs of 10, but hot-dog buns in packs of 8?
Why is it always 4 out of 5 doctors that recommend things? Why is it never 5 out of 5? Do 4 out of 5 doctors think 1 out of 5 doctors is an idiot?
Why does halftime seem longer when you're watching the game on TV, but incredibly short when you're at the game?
Why is it a crime to attempt suicide, but only if you fail? Isn't that insult to injury?
