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SOMEONE HELP ME!!

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 11:24 am
by JPFair
Just when I think that there has to be other people in the world with more problems than me, I have what could perhaps be the most horrific problem I have ever had to face. SOMEONE HELP ME WITH THIS.

Here's what happened! A very good friend of mine, who is not a sports fan, bought me a Redskins jersy. She thought she was doing so well, and so thoughtfull, that she decided to buy me a jersey. She knows my passion for the Redskins, and thought that it would be a great idea. So, she says she found a good deal on a Redskins jersey and bought it. In theory, it's a great idea. Her trying to make me happy by buying me a jersey from the greatest football franchise in the history of the game. Right?

WRONG!!

Here's the problem. I looked at the jersey, and sure enough, it's AWESOME. It even says 21 on the front. Here I am thinking "YES, I've got a Smoot jersey". The trouble is, I go to put it on, and notice on the back of it, in big white letters staring me in the face is "SANDERS". OH MY GAWWWWDDDDDDD!!!!

What a predicament!!!

Do I tell her "Ewwwwwwwww, I'm not wearing that thing" and risk insulting her when she thought she was doing the right thing, and trying to please me? I don't think I can even scratch the letters "SANDERS" off of it, and leave it blank. No wonder she got such a good deal on this thing. Hell, someone must have paid her to take it away.

WHAT DO I DO? I can't wear THAT.

THIS SUCKS!!

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 11:34 am
by Jake
Just tell her "Barry Sanders is playing for the Redskins!!?? I thought he was retired. This is his college number ya know? Thank you very much!"

Man, living with women my whole life, the one thing you don't want to do is get them sad or angry... at all! :wink:

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 11:38 am
by Skinsfan55
That is the saddest story I have ever heard...

It's worth a try to get the letters off, OR take it to a shooting range and pin it to a paper target.

I'm stuck with a Champ Bailey jersey :-(

These are expensive, why can't the NFL offer a buyback program where they just give you a couple bucks for an old jersey that they can recycle? :?

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 11:50 am
by BringThePain!
Sell it on E-bay...then take the money you get from it (which probably won't be much) and go buy a Smoot Jersey...Then if she askes...swear thats the one she got you and she must have read the name wrong...Sanders, Smoot...same first letters...same number...it's possible that she being a non-sports fan never even noticed.

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 11:53 am
by JPFair
Sell it on E-bay...then take the money you get from it (which probably won't be much) and go buy a Smoot Jersey...Then if she askes...swear thats the one she got you and she must have read the name wrong...Sanders, Smoot...same first letters...same number...it's possible that she being a non-sports fan never even noticed.


EXCELLENT idea. But, what if THATS where she bought it, and she sees it up there again? Where the hell did she get this garbage?

I'm stressing BIG TIME!! This can't be happening. I need a valium!

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 11:59 am
by BossHog
I have an idea...

Why don't you donate the jersey to charity and to somebody who will appreciate it?

:shock:

Of course, you could just get Smoot to sign the front of the jersey and then have it framed front out and nobody would ever know it said Sanders on the back except you.

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 12:01 pm
by JPFair
Of course, you could just get Smoot to sign the front of the jersey and then have it framed front out and nobody would ever know it said Sanders on the back except you.


EXCELLENT!! Best idea yet. All the more reason to head to fan appreciation day this year!!! You ROCK BH!!!

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 12:02 pm
by NC43Hog
Sorry to say there is only one thing you can do - take a note from Chicago and what they did to the cursed ball.

YOU MUST BURN IT!! Purge the Skins of the DION CURSE immediately!

I do not envy your dilemma.

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 12:06 pm
by Fios
Oh man that is funny

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 12:28 pm
by RedskinsFreak
NC43Hog wrote:Sorry to say there is only one thing you can do - take a note from Chicago and what they did to the cursed ball.

YOU MUST BURN IT!! Purge the Skins of the DION CURSE immediately!

I do not envy your dilemma.
Neither do I.

But I LOVE this idea. If not explosives, try kerosene and a match, hydrocloric acid, or douse it in gravy and toss it to the dogs.

As much as Riggins' run is my favorite Redskins memory, the day they signed TAFKAPT is easily the lowest day of my existance as a Redskins fan.

Nothing was gained that day.

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 1:06 pm
by hailskins666
what a sticky situation ](*,)

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 1:29 pm
by Redskins4Life
Boss Hog... you recommended getting the 21 jersey signed by Smoot. How easy is it to a get a players signature? I've only been to a game once and had crappy seats, and never been to training camp so i'm just wondering?

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 2:00 pm
by JPFair
I think I'll stick with the idea of having Smoot sign it, and getting it framed. Maybe that'll prompt her to buy me one that I can actually wear.

I'd hate to have to have this come down to a situation where I piss her off at the expense of keeping my Redskins loyalty intact. . I don't think she'd like the answer too much.

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 2:04 pm
by BossHog
Just put a book behind where you want freddie to sign, so he can push down hard and get a good sig... and make sure you fold up the rest of the shirt underneath it.... tight.

Don't let Fred see that he's signing a Deion jersey :shock:

Don't wanna get Smoot-smacked right there at the table on Fan Appreciation Day.

ROTFALMAO

But if you do, I hope I'm within earshot.

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 2:11 pm
by skinsfaninroanoke
I think I'll be there with my camera to get it all on mpeg for posting on the board ::grin::

I might just slip up and mention something about it being a Sanders shirt in earshot range ::evil laugh::

Nah - I wouldn't do that to a Hogs.Net bro...

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 2:27 pm
by JPFair
I'M SO CONFUUUUUUUUUUSSSSSSEEEEEEEEDDDDDD!!! I don't know what to do! Even if I have Smoot sign it, and run the risk of SF ratting me out, I'm gonna have a Sanders shirt in my house. I don't know if that's acceptable or not. If I burn it, she gets pissed off at me, and may not speak to me again.

Hey, maybe I should burn it.

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 2:29 pm
by skinsfaninroanoke
LOL

Nah I won't rat ya out - but I will be by yer side in case he spots it :)

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 2:30 pm
by jDub
i would say keep it. but, NEVER, NEVER, wear it out in public. sanders is probably going to be in the hall of fame one day. hold on to it for 10 years or so (in a dark secret place that no one can possibly stumble onto) and sell it on e-bay to some crazy collector for mucho deniro.

that is funny stuff man.

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 3:22 pm
by ANT7088
You CAN'T let Smoot sign it (LOL, that's wrong). I would where it a few times (only in front of her) then right before the season starts call her and say "What are the odds, the guy whos jersey you bought me, the Redskins just cut him. Oh man I can't where a jersey of a guy who's not on the team anymore (un-written rules tell her). Then replace it with a Smoot jersey and say "Hey look this is the guy that got his # now"

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 3:30 pm
by skinsfaninroanoke
LOL - not bad :)

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 4:08 pm
by DEHog
Nothing sexier then a girl wearing a skins jersey to bed at night...tell her you insist on her having it as a nighty and tell you want to get a matching one and go out a buy a Smoot jersey. Tell her Sanders just got cut but hey your only wearing it to bed so no one will know.

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 4:34 pm
by NC43Hog
DEHog wrote:Nothing sexier then a girl wearing a skins jersey to bed at night...tell her you insist on her having it as a nighty and tell you want to get a matching one and go out a buy a Smoot jersey. Tell her Sanders just got cut but hey your only wearing it to bed so no one will know.


Remember the game PacMan, and the sound it made when it got caught. That would be pretty much my reaction if my wife came to bed wearing a Dion Jersey! :lol:

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 4:41 pm
by skinsfaninroanoke
How about a Jeff George jersey? ::evil smile::

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 5:04 pm
by JPFair
Hey, I have done a lot of things in my life. But, there is NO WAY I will EVER sleep with someone wearing a Deion Sanders shirt!!

This is the worst predicament I've ever been in. This is the worst predicament I've ever been in. I wonder is there a support group I can contact regarding this.

Thank you guys for all your help. You've been a pillar of support for me in this difficult time. :-)

Posted: Sun Feb 29, 2004 5:11 pm
by tnathan
this really is the saddest thing in the world. i was really scared my girlfriend would do something like this on my birthday too. such a tough thing... people who don't know the team have no idea what to do (though i've done my best to get my girlfriend interested in and knowledgeable about the skins).
not to gloat or anything (because i really do feel for you), but to my girl's credit, not only did she buy me a new arrington jersey, but she woke me up on my birthday wearing it. and that was all.