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Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 4:27 pm
by General Failure
4th, the one is bi.
Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 4:38 pm
by Fios
tazlah wrote:First I want my pennies back!
If those are "gloves" containing "hands" as you insist -- where are your arms??? How are you supposed to hold Angelina without any arms???? And how do you scratch, clap, type for that matter????
My agent has advised that I claim to have no specific recollection of these alleged pennies.
As for my hands: Have you ever looked at Billy Bob Thorton? The man can barely stand on his own. Angelina is drawn to us emotionally/physically crippled types. Besides, it ain't my job to sell her on it.
Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 4:40 pm
by General Failure
He doesn't need arms. Check out that straw!
Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 4:53 pm
by JansenFan
General Failure wrote:He doesn't need arms. Check out that straw!

Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 7:21 pm
by Fios
JansenFan wrote:General Failure wrote:He doesn't need arms. Check out that straw!

I assume that laughter is a tacit admission of jealousy.
Posted: Wed Jun 08, 2005 8:00 pm
by tazlah
General Failure wrote:4th, the one is bi.
I wasn't going to mention
him.

Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 2:32 am
by General Failure
Post op! Post op! It's she now, dangit!
Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 11:22 am
by Justice Hog
So Angelina is now a lesbian? Is that what you're saying.
Well...I'm a lesbian, too (in a male's body). We have a lot in common!
Feel free to drop her a line from me!
Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 12:17 pm
by tazlah
Nope -- not what I said! Although, she has admitted to being bi -- but that's not who had the restraining order against GF! Fios just wants Angelina to consider lovin' an emotionally broken, no-arm-having, yellow "glove" wearing, soft-drink cup with a straw and eyes too close to the top of its lid!
Ain't gonna happen!

Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 2:25 pm
by Fios
Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 5:03 pm
by General Failure
tazlah wrote:Nope -- not what I said! Although, she has admitted to being bi -- but that's not who had the restraining order against GF! Fios just wants Angelina to consider lovin' an emotionally broken, no-arm-having,
yellow "glove" wearing, soft-drink cup with a straw and eyes too close to the top of its lid!
Ain't gonna happen!

We all know the rules. No glove, no love.
Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 7:56 pm
by tazlah
Well, I didn't mean to make you cry...
Just because Angelina won't go for it, doesn't mean you'll be alone forever; I found a
real princess for you. She's cute, and demure and very sweet (but don't upset her stepmother!)...

Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 8:03 pm
by Fios
tazlah wrote:Well, I didn't mean to make you cry...

Just because Angelina won't go for it, doesn't mean you'll be alone forever; I found a
real princess for you. She's cute, and demure and very sweet (but don't upset her stepmother!)...

Oooooooh, me likey the blondes. She seems a little two dimensional though and my agent has asked that I remind you while we agreed to remove the Loy-clause from the deal, the wedding with Angelina is still in effect. Tell you what, you find me an Angelina cup and we'll talk.
Posted: Thu Jun 09, 2005 11:21 pm
by General Failure
Dude, she's a blonde. Two dimensional is the best you can possibly hope for.
Tell you what though. I can get you a deal on a Lara Croft vibrator.
Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 3:43 pm
by tazlah
Who's a happy cup now?????

Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 3:50 pm
by Fios
OK, quick, someone find me a plastic justice of the peace, we're gettin hitched!
Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 4:09 pm
by General Failure
LEGO Judge Dredd, it's the best I can do on short notice. Take it or leave it.
Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 4:14 pm
by Fios
Well, he is The Law ... it will have to do
Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 5:17 pm
by Fios
OK, this chick ain't puttin out, I want a divorce!
Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 5:18 pm
by General Failure
Dude, she's a mug. Use your imagination.
Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 5:20 pm
by Fios
I tried that but she's all like "I'm tired, leave me alone"
Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 5:24 pm
by General Failure
She can't exactly fight back, and who's she going to tell?
Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 5:54 pm
by Fios
She just finished beating me and now I have to tell the cops I fell down the stairs ... thanks a lot man
Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 5:57 pm
by General Failure
Yes! Now I can console her after her fight with her jerk husband. *wrings hands and laughs*
Posted: Fri Jun 10, 2005 5:59 pm
by Fios
Fair warning: Her penis is very large ... woman have those too, right?